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The Perfect Lecture
"The Perfect Lecture" is the first episode of the second season and the eleventh overall. Summary It's the first day of school and Frank is determined to give the perfect lecture. Plot The school welcomes its student back after summer vacation, and they have mixed reactions about it. As a clique of girls discuss Steve and Frank, Pony meets with another student named Matt Attack and seems to fall in love. In Sammy's class, Matt reveals to his friend, Flip Flop, that he got Pony's number but soon becomes confused when Flip Flop claims she's a senior and is old. Meanwhile in the neighboring room, Steve gives a lecture and opens a bottle of beer, which is questioned by one of his students, Pemsy, about why he isn't teaching about NAFTA when the course is designed for it. Steve silences him as one girl asks another is Steve is charming. When the latter claims she isn't feeling it, Steve overhears and becomes attracted to her body, then decides to actually teach NAFTA. Frank's teaching skills are not well-received by his students, one of which throws up. Later during a break, Frank lies to Pony and Steve about how his students feel about him. As Baby Cakes enters, he gives them a proposal for a new snack, Meaty Saucy Energy Bar-ys, which comes in three flavors, none of which make sense to Pony. He then leaves to have a vending machine vend his snack idea, and Pony reveals she will be on a date with Matt. Frank tells her that Matt is a "baller", meaning "he can do anything with anyone." Entering the office, Sammy calls Pony out for help, leaving only the Smiths inside. Frank confesses that his students dislike his teaching style and that he wants to give a perfect lecture. Steve tells him that such lectures are rare, then gives Frank the rest of the day off as one of his students, Gwen, greets him. Entering the office, she reveals she isn't into him but is ignored by Steve. Meanwhile at Town Bar, Matt and Pony talk with each other. As Pony rubs her hair on his hand, Matt notices two girls nearby flirting with him, then claims he has practice to do. As he makes his way out, Pony offers to meet later in the week but is rejected. The next day, Steve stares at female students walking by as Frank slams his head against a door, tired. Steve hands him a coffee, which causes Frank to briefly levitate during his lecture and his students to applaud him as he claims he gave a perfect lecture. Meanwhile, Pony helps Sammy and experiences back pain, then notices that she has more in common with Sammy than she thought. Suddenly, Frank enters and tells them to watch what he is capable of. During Crystal's lecture, she claims there are no surprises in her class but is disproved when Frank bursts in and teaches her students history. In another room, Gwen and Steve chat but are interrupted when Pony informs Steve that Frank's intimidating Crystal's students. They watch Frank finish his lecture and rage when his coffee hasn't kicked in yet. He fakes a coffee spike akin to his earlier one, but the uninterested students leave as the bell rings. Frank insists to Steve that such a lecture happened while Pony tries to talk to an uninterested Matt. She experiences more back pain while Flip Flop gives Matt an "I told you so." Matt explains to Pony that he "has to spend his hotness on younger, fresher girls" and leaves. Pony, Frank and Steve gather at a table in Town Bar and discuss their various on-goings. Baby Cakes meets them and tells them that his proposal failed but will continue to make his snack, claiming it's a good idea. On a nearby television, Matt is seen pitching at a baseball game. When the announcers claim he has a routine before every game, Frank gets an idea to repeat the steps he took that led to his levitation with Steve's help, which includes dining at Chilibee's, barfing on the floor, and defecating in front of a certain woman. Meanwhile, Pony cleans Sammy's dentures and discovers that she looks like Sammy did back in college. She thinks that because of this and other signs of aging, she'll wind up like Sammy. Frank continues retracing his steps by watching the same movie he did the other night. Meanwhile, Baby Cakes empties a vending machine, replacing all the snacks with his energy bars. After he vows to do the same to the other vending machines, Flip Flop asks for a snack and is handed one of Baby Cakes' bars. Taking a bite, he shouts a positive comment while the Smiths continue Frank's plan. Frank notes that he got mugged, which gets done by Steve due to the absence of muggers. Frank then notes that he inadvertently stabbed his neighbor and goes over to stab him again. Before turning in for the night, he notes that he masturbated for five hours but never climaxed, so he follows through and wakes up the next day with an erection. Just before class, Steve gives Frank a coffee just like before, and the levitation occurs as expected. The students aren't as intrigued, though, but Frank insists on repeating this process daily. In doing so, he goes to extremes while Baby Cakes hands out his energy bars to students walking by. The next day, Steve chats with Gwen as Baby Cakes notices that his energy bars are gaining popularity. Frank gets his coffee like before and levitates again, only for one of his students to note that he already did so twice. At a grocery store, Pony sees Baby Cakes purchase a large quantity of meat and questions his intention. Baby Cakes explains himself, then notices Pony's apparent sadness. Pony explains she is feeling "withered", and Baby Cakes hands her an energy bar with the flavor of "withered granny's steak bar", which she rejects. Returning home, she attempts to give herself a makeover but ends up making herself look even more like Sammy. Baby Cakes restocks a vending machine but is stopped by the worker who's supposed to do the restocking. As Baby Cakes asks to be taken to the one in charge of vending machines, Gwen and Steve are about to kiss, but Frank interrupts them when he asks Steve to mug him. As Gwen leaves, Steve calls out Frank for the apparent stupidity of his plan. When Frank makes a comment that angers Steve, Steve slaps him, and Frank happily throws money at him since he went with his plan. At the head of vending machines, the executives reveal to Baby Cakes that they like his snack bars idea. They ask if he has any other ideas, and Baby Cakes thinks about non-food ideas, which gets the executives' attention. Over several days, Frank carries out his routine to levitate, much to Steve's annoyance. At a restaurant for senior citizens, Pony joins Sammy, who is surprised at her new look: identical to Sammy's. When Pony notes that she is a senior and should stop trying to hide it, she is told by Sammy that she still has 60 years until she'll look hike her. Sammy pulls out her pictures, which show that she looked like Pony until some time between 1998 and 2009, then tells Pony not to imitate her. Pony sees that some of Baby Cakes' energy bars are under a recall, namely those with non-food flavors, such as nine volt battery flavored ones. Strolling through a hallway with Gwen, Steve talks about the previous night and is kissed by her. He is just about to hand Frank a coffee as usual, only for Frank to reject it and go with an energy bar instead. Pony, who has reverted to her normal look except for a cap, asks Steve to fail Matt for her, and he agrees. As they watch Frank give his lecture, he doesn't levitate, much to one of his students' relief. However, the energy bar he ate causes him to reverse the damage done due to levitating and barf on most of his students. As Pony and Steve exit, Steve greets his class and is cheered on, much to Frank's displeasure. Trivia *Chilibee's is a reference to and portmanteau of Chili's and Applebee's. *Pony is 20 years old. *The flavor of the energy bar that Frank eats is "girl hair." *Frank is left-handed as seen when he masturbates. *Steve has a poster of Kenny Winker. *The diner Sammy dines in is called Din Din's, a parody of Jin Jin in name and Denny's in logo. *Leonard is absent in this episode. Goofs *When Frank says "Don't repress your desires, baby girl", he has six fingers on one hand. Quotes *'Steve': Baby Cakes, you weren't in my class. You know you're enrolled, for like the twelfth time. *'Steve': Baby Cakes That kid is really... just gonna stab us in our beds one night. *'Baby Cakes': out his energy bars Put my stuff in your mouth. It tastes right. *'Baby Cakes': Look at my supply being demanded. *'Baby Cakes': I know what students like. It takes one to know one. *'Sammy': Pony's makeover What on eastbound Earth?! *'Pony': that she has 60 years before she'll resemble Sammy So this means I'll look good until I'm 80. Sammy: Oh you got it backwards. I finally started looking good at 80. Characters Appearing *Baby Cakes *Bobby *Crystal *Falgot *Flip Flop *Frank *Gang Sang *Gwen *Jetta *Kim *Matt Attack *Pemsy *Pony *Sammy *Spider *Steve *The Dean Gallery Makeover Time.png|Pony is determined to give herself a makeover... Hopeless.png|...but loses hope when she feels she's failed. Gwen Steve.png|Gwen and Steve dating. Surrender.png|Pony finally accepts the fact that she'll eventually look like Sammy. Sammy Timeline.png|The pictures in Sammy's wallet. Click to enlarge Category:Episodes Category:Season 2